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it’s not all the time

i find myself here

but as long as I’m up high

i’ll keep reaching

for you

but in my reaching

i’ll also let things go

you know, those things…

because these are new seasons

new seasons of hope and joy are here

they’re coming on the wind

and my song will be powerful

in my weakness

because you have made me strong.

my cracking voice 

and sleep teared eyes.

but i will sing.

oh what a joy to be awake. !.

hallelujah. hallelujah.

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reaching up in the bright sunshine. covering my eyes. the air smells like salt. i can taste it as i run my tongue over my lips. it’s been windy, coming from the north. my hair is wet and tangled. sand is everywhere. I’m still wandering. adventuring. have I followed his voice tho. where is his voice. I’ve found you in every corner, but now I’m blind. or at least i feel a lil numb. I don’t wanna be numb anymore. being young is funny. I’m such an amateur, but i wouldn’t have it any other way. and i’m passionate. i’ve just realized that. i’ve always been passionate. I am a passionate person who is wandering. I know he is with me. in my passion and my wandering.

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Hawaii life

-Do a back 360 on a skimboard
-Learn how to surf
-Get a job (haha)

Who knew I’d be here? I sure didn’t.
Sometimes I still get scared, but I’m pretty sure this was a good decision.

Islands to mountains to islands again. But this is a dream a day. So here are my days

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"Love each other, as I have loved you."
I cannot love another unless I experience the love of God.

Long night of pacing and speaking. And, would you like any desert tonight?
Then sweeping sweeping and pushing the mop around.
I remember looking down at my feet, my face kinda hot kinda sweaty
And thinking these are the little things.
Hard work, and the many people that I come in contact with.
What do I leave them?
What bit of essence of life do I share?
It’s always been important to me to try to leave people with something good even if it can’t quite be noticed just built upon.
But I got jaded and bitter somehow.
I let my heart focus on what people owed me
And forgot that I can go right to the Source of Life and be full.
I forgot about loving because, somehow, I forgot who is my source.

Now as summer is slowly fading into fall,
I want his word to remain in me.
So that I will remain him.
And remember how much life is in the little things when my spirit is anchored in her source.

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first snow is dribbling in melted drops from the roof this morning.
my feet are cold.
the snow bunnies are soon to emerge from their summer hibernation.
I’m leaving this mountain town in 2 weeks.
still following the sun into the west.
happy changing seasons!

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is everything in preparation?…

that i must go down deep into my own darkness,

to truly understand what it means

and be filled with light

and understand.

what light is, what it means

how to leave the darkness behind.

(yours is the higher way)

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"Like spring rains on this desert land, I will come and give life to your soul." 

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I’m gonna find you and hear what you’re saying, even if I have to go alone into the wilderness to do it.

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You see through the eyes of world and color,

the textures and— 

                          (pressingpressing)

                        —hands down upon your hips,

spinning your breath into webs of spider silk,

                 catching

the very air in your throat,

turning it into dancing night.

and there’s a world of color (in your eyes),

where the water is so high and crashing,

ever so slowly under the sunset sky,

the questions that you keep asking,

simply swirl in dust storms from your lips.

         but there are many things that must go unsaid.

because these are just words;

just feelings and whispers of such things.

And yet you. continue to stand

      in the midst of the breakers. In the midst of his breath.